When you are trying to relieve some stress in your life, activities like exercising, yoga, and writing in your diary would come to your mind. However, have you ever thought about keeping a pet to reduce stress in your life? Humans indeed can offer support and comfort but one should not rule out keeping pets at home as they are also another source of social support. Added to the fact that keeping pets have will bring about certain health benefits to your life, you should definitely consider keeping one (that is IF you like having pets around AND that you have the time to raise one).

When I say pets, I don’t only mean cats and dogs but any kind of pets. They can be fishes, birds, terrapins or any other creature, as long that animal is of interest to you. Though, it is important to choose a pet that suits your temperament, living environment, and lifestyle. For example, if you’re living in a small studio apartment, it may not be wise to raise a Golden Retriever (a type of dog) as they need plenty of space to run around. So before deciding on what kind of pet to keep, make sure you do the proper research on whether it will be suitable for you to cohabit with the pet, if not this can cause additional stress to your life.

So here are a few ways in which having pets in your life can benefit you greatly!

1. Pets can help you reduce stress

Pet are great stress relievers and sometimes even better so than people. Research shows that people doing a stressful task while with their pets around actually experience less stressful moments then doing it with another person around. This may be because of the fact that pet can’t judge us. Thus we will be able to complete the task more smoothly.

2. Pets can help you socialize more

Keeping pets is a very enriching experience. It is also a great way to start a conversation with anyone, especially if the other person keeps similar pets as you. Moreover, if you have dog and take it out for a walk, it goes the impression that you are more approachable and more often than not, people will find reasons to stop and talk to you. This way, your network of friends increases.

3. Pets can make you feel emotionally better

If you simply adore animals, then nothing is more heartwarming to have your pet by your side while you sulk. The sight of their innocent puppy eyes or the touch of their silk-like fur seems to brighten up your life. Studies have shown the mood-enhancing advantages of keeping pets as men with AIDS are less likely to suffer from depression if they owned a pet. On the other hand, those that do not keep pets are THREE times more likely to show symptoms of depression. Therefore, if you know someone that is ill and loves animals, try bringing a pet around and see whether it will lighten their moods.

So if you love animals but don’t own any yet, give this one a shot! They will definitely change your life for the better. But remember to research on what kind of pets you can keep in your household first and if you can keep one, I say why not!

Stress is a big business in Western society. We live what we regard as hectic lives, that prime us with stress. That stress, to those who recognise its presence, requires relief. We are competitive beyond true need, and that too pumps more stress into us. We live lives that are devoid of spirituality, and that allows stress to infiltrate deeply into our daily existence, often to roam uncontrolled throughout our minds and bodies.

In our material world, it is no wonder that stress relief has become big business. Suffering stress has become habitual in Western society. Mostly, it is self imposed, a fabrication of the modern Western way of life. By and large, much of the stress experienced in Europe, North America, and Australia, is self imposed. There are signs too that in other rich countries, such as Japan and South Korea, the same thing is happening.

Almost 5 years ago I left England to live in the Philippines. My time here has taught me a lot about stress and its existence in England and other Western countries. My learning has come at three different levels:

1. Personal Stress Relief

I recall with total clarity my first visit to the Philippines, and especially my first visit to Palawan, where I have now settled. I remember the wonderful feeling I had, of being alive, in tune with myself, and totally stress free. Like many in England, I had lived for many years in a zombie like existence, trying to earn money, and working for other people. Often commuting long distances and for many hours, I had gradually lost my sense of existence as an individual. Some relief to that had come when I was able to start my own business with my ex-wife, and then to move to a beautiful location on the south coast. That relief did not last long, as divorce and all its ramifications brought a resurgence of stress.

When I arrived in Palawan, in the second part of a three week stay in the Philippines, that had all gone. Making a decision to come and live here permanently was easy, and it was done with complete clarity and full awareness. Talk about instant stress relief.

2. Stress In Perspective – Genuine Stress Of The Truly Poor

Stress has been around, no doubt, since early man lived in caves. The stress of survival. That is what true stress, or rather justified stress, is about. The need to survive, to hunt for a meal, to defend against attack.

Most families in the Philippines are very poor. I mean, really poor, not what we in England regard as poor. A poor person in England would seem very rich to many Filipinos. Most Filipino families live in housing conditions that would not be considered fit for a garden shed in England. While starvation is not generally an issue, malnutrition is widespread. Many families do not know from day to day if they will have enough food. If anyone in the family is ill, many will not be able to pay doctors fees or hospital fees. That is a basis for justified stress.

There is genuine scope for stress here in the Philippines, and of course it does exist. Unlike in England, though, it is not usually self inflicted at an individual level. Most people still manage to be hospitable, to smile, and to give thanks for what they do have. The generosity of the poor always impresses me. It is a humbling experience to witness.

Living here has made me feel guilty for my own country that it is riddled with stress, and that stress relief is such big business. The stress back home in England was unnecessary, and born out of greed, materialism, and a complete focus on self. I am grateful to the Filipinos for helping me to put that into perspective.

3. Spirituality In Stress Relief

Here in the Philippines, the people as a rule have open hearts. They are by nature spiritual, as are many Asian cultures. Many Westerners would dismiss such open heartedness as naive, primitive, innocence, and ignorance. It is those Westerners, though, who are living through ignorance. Ignorance of themselves and what their humanity is capable of.

I have come to believe, from observation in both England and the Philippines, that through allowing your spirituality to flow naturally, stress is reduced. Exploring spiritual avenues aids perspective in one’s own life. Spiritual avenues are a major source of stress relief, partially by the positive reaction they can bring within an individual’s life, and partially by filling gaps in an individual’s existence that would otherwise be flooded by negative thoughts, and thus by self inflicted stress.

Much of the Western stress, I believe, comes from a disassociation from a substantial part of our own humanity. Western life has become based on a minimal part of the human character, a tiny proportion of the scope of the human brain.

In other words, Western life has become full of emptiness. Much of the self inflicted stress stems from that void.

Stress is the curse of living in modern times. Everyone suffers from stress. And the stress we suffer takes a heavy toll on our bodies, emotions and minds.

Feeling stressed out, worn out by fatigue or just simply having a miserable day, the best thing to do is relax.

Watching television may be a form of relaxation for some, but is not a recommended method by experts. When we watch TV we are bombarded with commercials, ads, sounds and images. So how do we achieve relaxation? If there are thousands of ways we can get stressed, one of them is not meeting deadlines, there are also many ways we can relax.

In recent studies, experts have determined that heart disease is linked to anger and irritability is linked to mental stress. Too much stress brings about ischemia that can lead to or cause a heart attack. Relaxation takes on added importance in light of this matter. Managing your anger and attitude is significant to heart health, and relaxation can help you manage stress.

One way of relaxation is transcendental meditation. Recent studies have also shown that this method might reduce artery blockage, which is a major cause for heart attack and stroke. People practice transcendental meditation by repeating uttering soothing sounds while meditating, this is to achieve total relaxation. The researchers found that practitioners of transcendental meditation significantly reduced the thickness of their arterial wall compared with those who didn’t practice transcendental meditation.

Another study on another method of relaxation, acupuncture, seems to reduce high blood pressure by initiating several body functions for the brain to release chemical compounds known as endorphins. Endorphin helps to relax muscles, ease panic, decrease pain, and reduce anxiety.

Yoga is also another method for relaxation and may also have similar effects like acupuncture. In another study, participants were subjected to several minutes of mental stress. Then they were subjected to various relaxation techniques, such as listening to nature sounds or classical music. Only those who did Yoga significantly reduced the time it took for their blood pressures to go back to normal. Yoga is a form of progressive relaxation.

Breathing is one of the easiest methods to relax. Breathing influences alamost all aspects of us, it affects our mind, our moods and our body. Simply focus on your breathing, after some time you can feel its effects right away.

There are several breathing techniques that can help you reduce stress.

Another easy way to achieve relaxation is exercise. If you feel irritated a simple half-hour of exercise will often settle things down. Although exercise is a great way to lose weight, it does not show you how to manage stress appropriately. Exercise should also be used in conjunction with other exercise method.

One great way of relaxation is getting a massage. To gain full relaxation, you need to totally surrender to the handling and touch of a professional therapist.

There are several types of massages that also give different levels of relaxation.

Another method of relaxation is Biofeedback. The usual biofeedback-training program includes a 10-hour sessions that is often spaced one week apart.

Hypnosis is one controversial relaxation technique. It is a good alternative for people who think that they have no idea what it feels like to be relaxed. It is also a good alternative for people with stress related health problems.

Drugs are extreme alternatives to relaxation. They are sometimes not safe and are not effective like the other relaxation methods. This method is only used by trained medical professionals on their patients.

These relaxation techniques are just some of the ways you can achieve relaxation. Another reason why we need to relax, aside from lowering blood pressure in people and decreasing the chances of a stroke or a heart attack, is because stress produces hormones that suppress the immune system, relaxation gives the immune system time to recover and in doing so function more efficiently.

Relaxation lowers the activities within the brains’ limbic system; this is the emotional center of our brain.

Furthermore, the brain has a periodic need for a more pronounced activity on the right-hemisphere. Relaxation is one way of achieving this.

Relaxation can really be of good use once a relaxation technique is regularly built into your lifestyle. Choose a technique that you believe you can do regularly.

Have you ever listened to someone, perhaps even to your self, talk about being worried? You’ll hear things like, “I’m so worried”, “I’m worried sick”, or as my mom used to tell me, “You worry me to death!”

Certainly makes worry sound like a very powerful force, doesn’t it? And as a matter of fact, it is. Worry can make us sick, and in it’s most extreme form, it can kill us.

Then why in the world do we do this thing called worry? For some people, it’s simply become an emotional habit that they no longer think about. “I come from a family of worriers”, as if it’s a genetic feature like eye color. For others, it’s how to show you care about someone. “If I didn’t care about you, I wouldn’t worry”, as if worry is a form of love someone would want to receive.

Here’s what happens when we worry: because our brain cannot tell the difference between reality and a vividly imagined picture (worry), we respond the same way emotionally. So when we worry, our brains have gone into the future and created a vivid living color picture of our worry, and then our emotions, and even our physiology, rush up to match the picture.

Here’s a little experiment that will clearly show what I mean. Picture yourself at home in your kitchen, and then walking over to the refrigerator and pulling out a great big juicy lemon. Take it over to the counter, cut it in half, smell the juice and feel the juice on your fingers. Now cut one of the halves in half. More juice, more smell. Now cut a slice from one of the sections. More juice, more smell. Now bring that slice up to your nose and take a sniff. Then, finally, take a big bite of the lemon.

If your are like most folks, your mouth is watering now, and you may even be puckering up a bit too. Here’s the important thing to notice for our purposes: there is no lemon. You vividly imagined, with my guidance, a picture that caused a physiological response in your body. Remember, there is no lemon.

And so it is when we worry.

So that leaves us with a couple of choices when we worry: we can get an ulcer or we can get moving. Let’s take a closer look at each of these options.

How to Get an Ulcer

Worry. A lot. Raise it to an art form.
Make sure to worry about things you can do nothing about.
Or if you are worried about things you can do something about, be sure not to do anything about it.
Let your worry cause you to live all your moments in the future, missing the present of the present.
Become a “what-if person”: you know, “what if this happens, what if that happens…..”

How to Get Moving

Make a distinction between worry and concern. Worry freezes you, concern motivates you.
Allow your worry and concern to motivate you to plan for the future. Remember, the best way to predict the future is to create as much of it as you can.

Pray. A lot.

Since worry is really nothing more than using our imagination in a negative way, turn the process on it’s head. Instead of vividly imagining the worst possible outcome, switch to vividly imagining the best possible outcome, and/or the outcome you would like to have happen.

I’ve saved the best for last. The best cure that I know for worry is to TAKE ACTION! Create a plan, plan for the future, do every thing you can to prevent the negative outcomes you don’t want and do every thing you can to get the positive outcomes you do want.

The neat thing here is that if you do all the above suggestions to get moving, you won’t have time or space in your brain to worry. And my guess is you will enjoy life much more.

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1. The Law of the 1st Step

A good first step in getting organized is to 3-pile everything:

pile one is for those things to throw away

pile 2 is for those things that need immediate action

pile 3 is for those things that can be taken care of later, or filed, or both.

2. The Law of the Past

One of the curious things that seem to hold people back from getting organized is wanting to avoid dealing with things left over from the past. Working your way through the clutter can bring you face to face with past mistakes and failures. The best thing to do is face them, learn from them, and then really put them behind you, in the past.

3. The Law of Time

Many people use the excuse of “I just don’t have enough time to get organized.” If you really don’t have enough time to get organized, then you desparately need to get organized! While it does take some time and energy to get organized, it also brings the gift of adding much more time to your life.

4. The Law of 3-D

When something comes your way, a memo, an announcement, a piece of mail, whatever, there are three and only three things you can do with it to remain organized:

Do it: get it done and out of the way.

Delegate it: get someone else to get it done and out of the way.

Dump it: get it to the nearest trash receptacle and out of the way.

5. The Law of SYSTEM

Having a system, a step by step repeatable plan, for just about everything you do is simply invaluable. This is because SYSTEM stands for:

Saves
Your
Self
Time
Energy
Money

6. The Law of Stay

Once you get organized, do what ever it takes to stay organized. It takes a lot less time to stay organized than to get organized all over again. Trust me on this one.

7. The Law of Freedom

Most of us who are organizationally challenged have resisted organization because we don’t want to be controlled by anything or anyone. Quite the opposite is true, however. Getting organized allows you to experience more freedom and control than you thought possible.

8. The Law of Simplicity

Whatever system of organization you use, make sure you keep it simple. The more simple and easy to use, the more likely you are to use it.

9. The Law of “Put Your Hands On It”

You can tell you are getting organized when you need to find something and you can immediately “put your hands on it.” Saves time.

10. The Law of Place

Remember the old cliche “a place for everything and everything in it’s place?” The reason it became a cliche is that it works.

Let’s face it. If you are stressed, agitated and flitting about, your guests will be uncomfortable and won’t be able to relax. Here is an easy test of how well you are doing. How many times do your guests ask if there is anything they can do to help? It is reasonable that guests may ask when they first arrive but if you hear the question over and over again, you are doing something wrong.

The Dinner Party:

Do you become a shrinking violet at the mere thought of hosting a dinner party? Here are some quick and easy tips on how to host a successful party and not be too wiped out to enjoy the effort.

1. Plan it out on paper. Use the basic Who? What? Where? When? How?
2. Don’t over compensate. Your guests will not be impressed by 10 appetizers, 3 entrees and a dessert cart for a sit down dinner party. If you are doing a buffet that is a different situation.
3. Balance Colors. Bad move: all of the food in a neutral color. This not only indicates that your food choices are boring but are also lacking in nutrition. Good move: Lots of color!
4. Use the foods of the season. For example: Do not plan a menu using strawberries in the middle of winter as it may be difficult to find any that are top quality. Do use apples, pumpkin, and squash in your fall dinner menus.
5. Dress to impress…the food that is. Plan a menu that looks elegant, but doesn’t consume three days to prepare. It is all in the presentation. The simplest dish can look exquisite.
6. Have everything staged and ready to go in advance. Your guests will be uncomfortable if you are flitting in and out of the kitchen.
7. Practice, practice, practice. Use your family for regular practice runs. Always set the table with matching cutlery and dishes and put food in serving dishes. This way you know what you have and are not floundering to figure out how to present your meals to guests.

Here is a quick plan for a holiday/winter dinner party:

Make a list of 6 of your closest friends and invite them over for an evening dinner. If you are in a panic just thinking about dinner for 8, you need to register for our Entertaining Workshop but for an immediate fix, read our tips below:

Prepare a simple menu that does not require a lot of ingredients and a lot of stove watching (bird watching is easy in comparison).

For red meat:

• Salad with vinaigrette dressing, cranberries and nut of choice (pecans, walnuts, almonds)
• A lamb or beef roast with red potatoes, baby carrots, onions and seasonings
• A red wine with dinner. We are partial to Breaux Vineyards Lafayette if you want a local Virginia wine.
• Cheese and grapes for dessert
• Port or Dessert Wine with dessert

For chicken:

• Salad with vinaigrette dressing, cranberries and nut of choice (pecans, walnuts, almonds)
• Champagne Chicken (contact us if you want the recipe)
• Saffron Rice
• Steamed Asparagus or Broccoli
• A white wine with dinner. We are partial to Breaux Vineyards Vidal Blanc if you want a local Virginia wine.
• Cheese and grapes for dessert
• Sherry or Dessert Wine with dessert

Notice we did not offer a heavy dessert or a lot of food choices. During the holidays we all tend to overeat and a simple but elegant meal is a welcome change.

Larger Parties:

If you feel that you have the small dinner party under control and are ready to branch out to large group entertaining, here are the basic steps to making a gathering a success:

1. Decide what type of party you are going to have. Cocktail hour, dinner buffet or hors d’oeuvres. This will drive your menu as well as your cost and party supplies.
2. Determine the area in your house where you want to have the party.
   • How many people can stand or sit comfortably in this area? This isn’t a crowded bar/night club. Having to say “excuse me” and bumping into people loses its charm very quickly.
   • Check your room arrangement. Is it an open floor plan if you intend for people to stand? Move the furniture out of the way. Bruised shins from coffee tables are no fun. Is it conducive to conversation if you are using your seating areas? Rearrange furniture into conversation areas.
   • Are there places for people to set drinks? Nervous nelly coaster girl/guy is not attractive. If you want your guests to use coasters, have them strategically placed throughout the area ahead of time.
   • Ventilation: Keep the temperature a little lower than normal in an area that is going to be full of people. It will heat up fast when everyone gets in the room. If you are using candles for ambiance, remember that they add heat to a room.
3. The “Bar”: If you are having a cocktail hour, then a fully stocked bar is more essential than if you are having a dinner buffet. Keep these facts in mind.
   • Bars are very expensive to stock because there are essentials you must have to satisfy the drink needs of your guests.
   • A bartender is essential if you have a full bar. It doesn’t have to be a professionally hired bartender but it needs to be someone who knows his/her way around a bar and the drink menu.
   • If you are having a dinner buffet where the focus is food rather than drink, then make choose signature drinks. Have one or two specialty drinks for your guests that you can make in advance, serve in pitchers or decanters and have on a min self-serve bar. Again there are essentials you must have like an ice bucket but you do not need a fully stocked bar and a bartender in these situations.
   • The placement of the bar is key. It needs to be in an open, accessible area.
4. The Menu. We could write a whole article on your menu so here are a few key reminders.
   • Have a theme. That doesn’t mean you have to don a sombrero for Mexican or throw plates for Greek food but you need to have some commonality for your menu or you will end up with a hodge podge of random items and probably too many of them to boot. Your theme does not have to be an international food either. It could be “winter foods” or “seafood” for example.
   • Keep dietary and religious restrictions of your guests in mind.
   • If having a cocktail hour, keep the menu to a few appetizers no more.
   • If having a dinner buffet, keep the menu balanced. Appetizers should not overpower main course or dessert.

An Alternative to a Dinner Party – A Wine Party

Do you have to be a sommelier to know something about wine? Well, if you want to tout yourself as an expert, perhaps but if you just want to enjoy a good glass of wine, go with your gut – or rather your mouth – and enjoy what tastes good to you. Once we survive the holidays, not many people want to throw another lavish bash in the winter months. So, why not host a wine tasting party? Now before you hit the panic button, get uptight and claim to know nothing about wine, stop! We aren’t proposing you sit around discussing bouquet and barrel fermenting. We want you to have a little fun.

You can buy wine tasting party kits from various sources on the internet and local shops. Don’t want a kit? Here’s what you need:

• Guests – think about whom you know that likes and drinks wine and keep the numbers small
• A few bottles of wine that you think you might like – both red and white. Depending on the size of the crowd plan on 2 bottles of each type. Or for an added twist, ask your guests to each bring 2 bottles of their favorite wine. If you do this you will need them to email or phone you with the wine information ahead of time.
• Printed wine tasting cards that list the wines you purchased with some information from the bottle
• Pencils in case guests want to make notes about their favorites
• Wine glasses. We recommend 2 per person. One for tasting and one for later
• Plain saltine or oyster crackers for guests to cleanse their palates
• Still (plain) water for rinsing
• Some good music, good conversationalists and a sense of fun!

At the end of the event, serve some crackers/bread, cheese and fruit or some other small/light appetizers and offer each guest a glass of his/her favorite wine. Wine charms are a fun thing to introduce at this point. Each person can pick her/her own and attach to the glass. Put on some music and enjoy the company. However, above all things, drink and serve responsibly!

Crank up the wine party one notch

Even though the farmer’s market is closed and the weather has turned quite chilly, the fall and winter have a lot to offer our palate. As we have told you before, leverage what you have and embrace the winter weather. Serve your guests wine, cheese and winter fruits.

One of our favorites is eiswein (pronounced ice vine). Eiswein or Ice Wine as it is called in this country is a wine that is made with the late harvest fruit by pressing it while still frozen…thus the name. Now here is the catch. Eiswein is not something you can pick up at your local supermarket and it doesn’t come in bargain basement $5/bottle prices. Here are a few of our picks and where you can get them.

Eiswein is usually sold in 1/2 bottles due to the high sugar content of the wine and the cost…less is more!

Locally: Total Beverage Check with your particular store because they don’t all carry the same items. Most of them have the Hubert Ganz Riesling Eiswein (1/2 bottle $40) and the Selaks Wines Ice Wine Kumeu (1/2 bottle $14). Some of them also have the Inniskillin Vidal Ice Wine (1/2 bottle $70…and a favorite of ours)

On the Internet:www.champagnewines.com and www.internationalwine.com

And who says an eiswein has to be made with grapes. La Face Cachee de la Pomme in Canada makes a scrumptious apple ice wine (cidre de glace). For more information, visit appleicewine.com. In case you don’t feel like making the trek to Canada in the winter, check their website for US locations.

Now that you feel like you speak several other languages, what cheese do you serve with these delectable wines? We recommend Roquefort. You need something with a little punch to it to counterbalance the wine. However, we do not profess to be wine or cheese experts so buy a bottle of eiswein and some of your favorite cheeses and have your own private tasting party before you serve to your guests. The wines could also be paired with some not-so-sweet desserts.

So the quick recap to plan your party:

• Eiswein (not as many bottles as for regular wine)
• Seltzer or Club Soda for non-drinking guests
• Cheeses – 4 or 5 types
• Fruits – apples and grapes
• Non-sugary desserts (cheesecake is good) – 2 or 3 items

3 Key Distinctions

Fight or Flight – The fight or flight response is hard-wired into our nervous system. A long time ago, when the lion jumped out of the bushes, we had a choice: fight the lion or run for all your worth (and then change your loincloth). Today, when the idiot driver cuts us off or the boss yells at you, we have the same reaction, fight or flee. These days we fight by yelling and screaming, or we flee into TV, over-work, addictions, and other forms of “psychic numbness.”

Stress or Distress – Bad events can be stressful. Duh. Did you know that good events can be stressful as well? Graduating, marriage, having kids, moving, promotions, while potentially good things, can still be a source of stress.

Stress or Pressure – Stress comes from the outside, such as a deadline or expectation. Pressure is an inside job. Pressure is what we tell ourselves about the stress.

Examples:

“How am I ever going to get all this done?”

“I’ll never make that deadline!”

“Pressure is to stress as humidity is to heat: it just makes it worse.”

3 Response Options

Responding to stress is like being in the waves at the beach. You can:

Let It Knock You Down – Take the “dead roach approach” – just let stress have it’s way with you.

Survive It – Get by, get through, get it over with. Sounds good, but think about it. How excited would you be to get up each day saying, “Alright, I get to go survive today!”

Ride & Thrive – Discover and use creative tools to make the stress in your life work for you instead of against you.

4 Ways to Ride & Thrive

1. The Powerful Art of Reframing – Reframing is a tool that can alter the pressure we put on ourselves. It means exactly what it sounds like – to put a different frame on a situation. Have you noticed how different a painting can look when you change the frame around it? The wrong frame can ruin a painting, while the proper frame can please the eye and reveal details not otherwise seen.

EX: Instead of “I’m never going to get all this done” how about “In how many ways can I get all this done and more, and enjoy the process?” While some people will say this is just semantics, I say it’s really using the power of words and focus to change your life!

2. The Lost Art of Human Hibernation – What with email, faxes, cell phones and beepers, we’ve made ourselves always available and therefore always “on.” When animals don’t hibernate, they become anxious, overly aggressive and sluggish. Sound like any one you know?

EX: Whether it’s five minutes of total quiet with no distractions or a 3 day personal retreat, regularly refresh your self with some “human hibernation.”

3. The Never Ending Search for Humor – When we brought our son home, I thought “I’m supposed to take care of this little creature and I can’t even remember to take out my contacts at night!” During one of the first diaper changes, he did what little boys do and aimed it right at Lauren. She put up the palm of her hand to block it and then started pushing back the stream like Superman and the death-ray. We laughed so hard we cried, and decided we might be able to do this after all.

EX: Look for the humor, no matter how absurd, in any stressful situation. Remember, if you can laugh about it, you can survive it, and even thrive it!

4. The Incredible Power of Action – All of the above is merely mildly amusing information if you don’t use it.

EX: Use just one of these stress busters today. Or if you really want to get wild and crazy, use all ten!

Stress Out

We’ve all said the infamous and useless phrase, “I’m stressed out!”

Here’s my question – “How many times do you have to say ‘I’m Stressed Out!’ before saying it starts to help?”

Similar to saying “I’m having a nervous breakdown”, this is a meaningless phrase that only serves to make us feel sorry for ourselves, and leads to no change at all.

Stress Down

Sounds really good, doesn’t it. Just reduce and/or eliminate all the stress from you life and everything will be OK. The problem is it’s just a myth that contributes to our feeling more and more stressed out.

We live in an increasingly complex and fast paced world, and unless we are bombed back to the Stone Age (a entirely different kind of stress), it’s just going to continue. So what we need are powerful tools for dealing with the stress in our lives, which leads to…….

Stress Through

In order to “stress through” you need to learn how to make the stress in your life work for you. To that end, here are 4 Stress Tools that you can use right away.

1. Tool of Resources

There are lots of resources out there to help you successfully manage your stress.

2. Tool of Relaxation

Here’s something I call “push-button relaxation.” Picture yourself somewhere that is very relaxing and peaceful. See, hear and feel everything as if you were there. Now create your own personal button to create this picture and feeling. For some people it’s a snap of the fingers, others use a word or phrase or lines from a song. Whatever quickly takes you there in your imagination. Use your push-button when you are feeling stress and notice the difference.

3. Tool of Battle

This does not mean to grab your sword and shield. It does mean to pick your battles wisely. Whether the situation is parent-child, between spouses, boss-employee, with a co-worker, neighbor or whomever, it’s vital to ask the question, “Is this a battle worth fighting?” Many of us tend to major in minor things. We let too many little things upset us. The more you ask this question, you’ll have less needless battles, less stress and more energy.

4. Tool of Fun & Spontaneity

We’ve just about killed off fun and spontaneity with our over scheduled and day planner run lives. I’ve even seen one friend’s daily schedule that had a 15 minute block that said “have fun.”

Self-Care Strategies:

Substantial breakfast daily

Regular sleeping habits (minimum of 7 hours)

No smoking

Moderate use of alcohol, caffeine and other drugs

Minimal intake of sugar & highly processed foods

Maintenance of proper weight

Regular exercise program

Drink much more water than you usually do.

Relaxation Techniques:

Jog in place or do jumping jacks—count to 300

Roll head and torso from side to side

Tense your muscles individually, then relax them

Pull seat of chair for 5-count: repeat with legs xtended

Take a deep breath to count of 4, exhale to 4, and repeat 4 times

Massage your forehead or temples; repeat the word “calm”

Try to walk at least 10,000 steps a day. Walk off your worry.

Meditate for 20 minutes

Listen to music and close your eyes

Take a power nap. Train yourself to sleep for 12 minutes.

Time Management:

Decide what your time is worth. Hire some tasks done.

Learn to delegate. You don’t have to do or supervise everything.

Set priorities.

Invest your time in the thing that will give you the highest return on your investment.

Plan your day according to energy levels.

Manage the paper tiger. Try to handle paper only once.

New Ideas for Success:
Always have a plan B in mind.

People with options are happier.

Set realistic life goals and work toward them daily.

Let go of uncomfortable situations and toxic relationships.

Practice setting boundaries in an Assertitive but respectful manner.

Assume responsibility for your own choices.

Remember the 4 things that matter most:

Please forgive me, I forgive you, Thank you and I love you.

Give top priority to your primary relationships.

Stressors in life- Stressors in life- Stressors in life- Stressors in life- Stressors in life- Stressors in life

Trying to control things you can’t control—-Not living one day at a time—–Lack of goals

Not clear on your values—-Unrealistic expectations of yourself and others—-Negative attitude and outlook—-Procrastination—-Trying to keep secrets—-Listening to gossip—-Taking on more than you can physically or emotionally handle—-Lack of balance in all areas of your life—-Unhealthy habits—-Changes, either good or bad ones—-Lack of faith in the future—-negative self-talk.